Dumbest/Stupidest/Shittiest/All-around worst Nintendo console

[nat]

Nintendo 64 - What an utter failure in all regards.

Extremely poor 3D graphics when viewed in retrospect (not that they were a real treat at time of release). To make matters worse, the console features, like, less than 10 2D games (OK, maybe 20). That means 95% of the console's library looks like shit visually. Some of the best games on the system are 2D: Mischief Makers, Bomberman Arcade (the 2D one, not that Bomberman 64 shit), Magical Tetris Challenge, the Bust-A-Move series, etc. So much un-tapped 2D potential.

A severely limited storage medium. Who the f*ck was still using cartridges exclusively in 2000? Nintendo, that's who. One of the worst marketing decisions of ALL TIME. While companies like NEC were producing CD games as early as the 1980s, Nintendo didn't catch on until almost 15 years later.

The hardware deficiencies don't stop there. The Nintendo 64 also has the distinct honor of featuring the worst controller design of ALL TIME. The analog thumbsticks all went limp after less than a year of use. You had to place your left hand on a completely different grip depending on whether or not you were using the analog stick or the d-pad. The memory card slot on the controllers were extremely touchy; if you didn't have the memory card inserted JUST RIGHT there was a 50% chance you could say goodbye to all your save files. To top it all off, the controllers had the build quality of a cheap TODDLER'S TOY. It boggles the mind the same company who just a few years prior produced one of the best controllers in the video game universe (SNES) stumbled to this level.

Insufficient RAM meant anything beyond mediocre 3D (for the time, it could be argued all N64 3D is mediocre at best, anymore) rendered at sluggish framerates unless you purchased a memory expansion.

Game library was relatively small by comparison to its older siblings (NES and SNES), with far less diversity in genres. A lot of the 3D games are downright awful; you can't even tell what the hell is going on in a handful of them due to broken camera mechanics and muddy, pixelated "textures." Mario 64 was actually a promising effort, but even Mario suffered from some camera issues. Super Mario Kart is also a decent game... If you're playing it in one or two-player mode. By the time you get three-or-four players involved, the low-resolution polygons in the 4-way split-screen just don't cut it and it's often difficult to see what's coming until it's too late.

I'm personally amazed the N64 did as "well" as it did. I believe this had a lot to do with the fact Nintendo was riding high on the success of the console's forerunners. Kids ran out and bought it on release based only the fact it was a new Nintendo product. The Playstation One didn't exactly blow it out of the water in the 3D department, but the library was gigantic, with lots more 2D games to boot.

The GameCube turned out to be a much, much better console design-wise but still suffered from a poor-ish game library. The Wii is arguably Nintendo's best console to date. Not only does it offer hardware support to play GC games, it will also play N64, SNES, and NES titles via emulation. You're talking about nearly 30 years of software on a single console. By comparison, the N64 will play 4 or 5 years worth of some of the most mediocre games Nintendo ever produced.

[SuperDeadite]

N64 of course.  I think Goldeneye was the only game on it I enjoyed, but even then I rather
play Doom.

[Tatsujin]

So Dito! can't add much more than already nuff said by nat!

[TR0N]

N64 all ways thought it's controller was to arkward to use not to mention most of it's good games,were frist party only.

[Senshi]

I agree with everything already said about the N64. I have a freind who has one and loves it. I just sit their and snicker at him 

However, I voted Gamecube because I can't name one game on that thing if you asked me other than Luigi's mansion. Plus it just looks silly.

[BlueBMW]

While I agree the N64 is probably Nintendo's worst console... I personally really like the system.  My reasons are more nostalgic than anything.  

I had only had a Genesis and SNES before the N64, so I had only played 2D games for the most part.  I first saw the N64 advertised at school of all places.  Every morning we would watch Channel 1 and there were ads for the N64 on there.  When I saw Mario 64 and Waverace 64, I was impressed by the concept of being able to go anywhere.  Meaning in a game like Mario, I wasn't restricted to a 2D plane, I could go anywhere!  I dont know why, but at that time (I think I was 12 years old or so) that just looked so fun to me.  I guess I had never really played anything that 3D before.  When I did get the N64, I wasn't disappointed!  It was as fun as I expected it to be!  My friends and I would all pile up in someones living room for hours to play Mariokart 64 and Goldeneye.  Even today, some of my friends and I still get together for sessions of Mariokart and WCW/NWO revenge.

At the time, a few of my friends had Playstations (I only knew one guy with a Saturn) so I only had a few titles to compare to.  I remember seeing Jet Moto and thinking: "that looks like a crappy Waverace."  Mind you, this is a 12yr old's logic at work here  It wasn't until I saw Final Fantasy 7 that I got really interested in getting a Playstation.   I ended up getting a PSX eventually with FF7, Cool Boarders 2, Ace Combat 2, and Jet Moto.  But I kept my N64, and it still gets use to this day.

Looking at the system now, I agree that the hardware itself is weak, the graphics are weak, the controller is weak.  But because of my own personal history with the system, I'll always like it.  Banjo Kazooie will probably always be my number one most favorite game of all time across all consoles.  

Oh and a side note on the controller.... yeah its kind of weak physically, and the design is funky.  But I actually like it too.  I know as a kid I wanted to get four controllers of different colors.  (Blue, Green, Red and Yellow)  I liked the Yellow one the best for some reason.  At the time I thought the analog stick felt good and the c pad was utilized well in most games.

So anyways, now that you all know I'm an N64 nut... let the discussion commence

Edit: I guess I should mention that I am also a big fan of the Gamecube too.  That was the only system I bought on launch day, and I dont regret it one bit    I guess I have an affinity for crappy systems!

[chany60126]

For me, the Nintendo Wii is the worst console of the bunch, although the n64 takes a close second. N64 games just haven't aged well at all as the character designs are very clunky and developers were still trying to figure out this 3D thing. But there were some awesome games released that are still fun to play like Zelda OOT and my favorite wrestling game of all time: WCW Vs. nWo Revenge.

So my least favorite nintendo console is the Wii. Most of the games I see are either way too gimicky and/or aimed towards the 'casual gamer'. Heck, there are even games for grandma and grandpa to play like the Price is Right. Don't get me wrong, the system does have good games such as Punch Out and just about any Mario platformer is good. I have to admit that I am biased in favor retro games, but I take a look at store ads for Wii games and none seem to interest me. I'll give Nintendo some props for implementing the Virtual Console. But then again, it may have been one of the contributing factors in the dramatic increase in price of turbo games the last couple of years or so.

[DragonmasterDan]

Nintendo 64 - What an utter failure in all regards.

Extremely poor 3D graphics when viewed in retrospect (not that they were a real treat at time of release). To make matters worse, the console features, like, less than 10 2D games (OK, maybe 20). That means 95% of the console's library looks like shit visually. Some of the best games on the system are 2D: Mischief Makers, Bomberman Arcade (the 2D one, not that Bomberman 64 shit), Magical Tetris Challenge, the Bust-A-Move series, etc. So much un-tapped 2D potential.

A severely limited storage medium. Who the f*ck was still using cartridges exclusively in 2000? Nintendo, that's who. One of the worst marketing decisions of ALL TIME. While companies like NEC were producing CD games as early as the 1980s, Nintendo didn't catch on until almost 15 years later.

The hardware deficiencies don't stop there. The Nintendo 64 also has the distinct honor of featuring the worst controller design of ALL TIME. The analog thumbsticks all went limp after less than a year of use. You had to place your left hand on a completely different grip depending on whether or not you were using the analog stick or the d-pad. The memory card slot on the controllers were extremely touchy; if you didn't have the memory card inserted JUST RIGHT there was a 50% chance you could say goodbye to all your save files. To top it all off, the controllers had the build quality of a cheap TODDLER'S TOY. It boggles the mind the same company who just a few years prior produced one of the best controllers in the video game universe (SNES) stumbled to this level.

Insufficient RAM meant anything beyond mediocre 3D (for the time, it could be argued all N64 3D is mediocre at best, anymore) rendered at sluggish framerates unless you purchased a memory expansion.

Game library was relatively small by comparison to its older siblings (NES and SNES), with far less diversity in genres. A lot of the 3D games are downright awful; you can't even tell what the hell is going on in a handful of them due to broken camera mechanics and muddy, pixelated "textures." Mario 64 was actually a promising effort, but even Mario suffered from some camera issues. Super Mario Kart is also a decent game... If you're playing it in one or two-player mode. By the time you get three-or-four players involved, the low-resolution polygons in the 4-way split-screen just don't cut it and it's often difficult to see what's coming until it's too late.

I'm personally amazed the N64 did as "well" as it did. I believe this had a lot to do with the fact Nintendo was riding high on the success of the console's forerunners. Kids ran out and bought it on release based only the fact it was a new Nintendo product. The Playstation One didn't exactly blow it out of the water in the 3D department, but the library was gigantic, with lots more 2D games to boot.

The GameCube turned out to be a much, much better console design-wise but still suffered from a poor-ish game library. The Wii is arguably Nintendo's best console to date. Not only does it offer hardware support to play GC games, it will also play N64, SNES, and NES titles via emulation. You're talking about nearly 30 years of software on a single console. By comparison, the N64 will play 4 or 5 years worth of some of the most mediocre games Nintendo ever produced.

Hindsight is always 20/20. The N64 obviously has the smallest library and the biggest step down visually since early 3D games generally look worse than NES 2D games, but part of the problem is you're looking at it through the eyes of someone who has lived through the HD era. Seeing Super Mario 64 in 1996 imparted a feeling of sheer wonderment and amazement to nearly all who gazed upon it, it was so far ahead of anything that had come before it the start of "quality 3D games" besides driving, flying or first person shooters really began right there.

Going back to playing it today, it looks terrible but there's more elite level games I'd go back and play on the N64 than the original Playstation (there's more good games on Playstation, but more GREAT games on N64). Also with regards to the thumbsticks, I have my four original N64 controllers purchased in 1996, they all work great. If your controllers are failing someone was abusing them.

For me, the Nintendo Wii is the worst console of the bunch, although the n64 takes a close second. N64 games just haven't aged well at all as the character designs are very clunky and developers were still trying to figure out this 3D thing. But there were some awesome games released that are still fun to play like Zelda OOT and my favorite wrestling game of all time: WCW Vs. nWo Revenge.

So my least favorite nintendo console is the Wii. Most of the games I see are either way too gimicky and/or aimed towards the 'casual gamer'. Heck, there are even games for grandma and grandpa to play like the Price is Right. Don't get me wrong, the system does have good games such as Punch Out and just about any Mario platformer is good. I have to admit that I am biased in favor retro games, but I take a look at store ads for Wii games and none seem to interest me. I'll give Nintendo some props for implementing the Virtual Console. But then again, it may have been one of the contributing factors in the dramatic increase in price of turbo games the last couple of years or so.

Most games on any system are bad. The Wii has lots of great games, particularly on WiiWare. Basing the system strictly on its merits the Wii is pretty excellent, it has some absolutely fantastic quality games, a quick look at gamerankings all time best list reveals two wii exclusive games on the top 3, and all of the top 3 are playable on the Wii in one form or another. The virtual console adds value to the Wii and gives it a gigantic library of games both new and old. From Super Mario Galaxy, to Zelda, to Metroid Prime, to Muramasa, to Punch Out, to Cave Story, to World of Goo, and then moving on to the gigantic library of great titles available on virtual console the Wii in terms of number of "good games" available to it for legitimate purchase may be the best system ever.

Added in edit: Oh and it plays Game Cube games as well

[Jibbajaba]

This is a tough one.  I have an RGB-modded N64 that I enjoy playing, but really it's only because of a few games.  But the same can be said for the Game Cube and Wii.  I had a Game Cube but really only ever played Resident Evil 4 and Animal Crossing on it.  I have a Wii, but only play NSMB on it. 

The N64 for me isn't that bad of a console - just a huge let-down after the Super NES.  Like I said, mine is RGB-modded so the picture looks really nice, and I play it with a Hori Mini-Pad, so the shitty stock controller isn't a problem.  As far as the thumbsticks on the original controllers (which are definitely terrible) you can buy replacements on eBay that are based on the Game Cube controller thumbsticks.

I really look at the Wii as just being an upgraded Game Cube, so to me the GC/Wii is the worst Nintendo console.

Chris

[SignOfZeta]

N64 is the worst, no question. I don't agree in the reasoning area so much though.

The 3D was bad? Yes, it was, but bad compared to what? The other two systems were at least as bad.

I also have no problem with cartridges. In case you didn't notice, cartridges have more or less come back with a vengeance. The next generation of consoles is likely to have %100 solid state storage, and the PSP will end up being the only handheld to use discs. The cartridge thing may have held back some of the games because of storage limitation, but it made up for it by sparing us the horrendous load times of the PS.

Also, the controller: while stupid, I didn't find it to be all that badly made. The d-pad is super solid and the buttons, while small, are as good as the SFC controller. Since I never hardly even used my N64 the controllers were in perfect condition when I sold the system.

The biggest problem with the N64 was the whole idea of making something super high end and trying to blow the competition away. This lead to everything just costing too f*cking much development-wise, which lead to small software selection. Nintendo learned from this big time by the time the Cube and Wii came around. The Cube and Wii were cheap to produce and develop for and in the end the sales and profits are really good, even though the software selection is still pretty lackluster aside from a few major releases every year.

The games on the N64 are often times just...bad. Even the first party ones. Yoshi's Island on SFC is basically the best game ever made. Yoshi's Story on N64 is just f*cking terrible. Possibly the worst platformer Nintendo ever made. Mario Kart 64...oh how I hate this game. Again, the SFC one was magic but the N64 one took a high strategic and reflex intensive racing masterpiece and turned it into a game of dice. Shit like blue shells are bad enough, but the rubber band effect is in place at other levels. A racing game where being in first place is the worst place to be is a shitty racing game. Also, they widened the courses and the corners so f*cking much that they turned what was very F1 into basically NASCAR. If you suck at racing, then I'm sure Mario kart 64 is right up you ally.

Favorite games on the system: Wave Race, Pilot Wings.

Regarding people who hate the GC/Wii more...I can't even begin to understand where you are coming from. I can only assume you would be...lets see...23-29 years old? That would place you in a situation where you were very young when the N64 came out and still suffering from rose tinted glasses. The N64 suuuucked. The Cube had mario Sunshine, a (barely) better Waverace, Luigi's Mansion, some Super f*cking Monkey Balls, the Gameboy Player, Killer 7, Alien Hominid, Tales of Symphonia (an actual, real, full on contemporary JRPG, something the N64 never got), that cool Kinikuman game, Phantasy Star Online, Animal Crossing, a very good Gundam game, Bomberman Land 2...way more good stuff that is still more playable than that piece of crap N64. The hardware itself is also exemplary. It virtually never breaks. The small discs leave you with very little load times (virtually none on 1st party releases), cute shape, the Wavebird (best wireless pad ever when it was released), and, again, the Gameboy Player which is rad.

Edit:

And the Wii...the Wii does essentially all this stuff (only the Gameboy Player is lost) plus all the Wii stuff. The Wii shop is loaded with more cool stuff than I have time to play. I give a lot of credit to Nintendo for actually putting all four controller ports and both memory card slots on the Wii and retaining %99 cube compatibility. They didn't have to do that.

[guyjin]

I voted N64, as all rational people would given these choices.

but we all know that the correct answer is the Virtual Boy.

[Arkhan]

N64 for me. Definitely.  I never owned one.  I still dont.  I own copies of the games I did like.  I bought them and played at my friends house.  I saw no point in buying a cart based system with dumbass graphics and an irritating controller when I had the Playstation with multi-disc sexfests like FFVII, and games like Oddworld.   Oddworld is better than any game the N64 ever had.

The controller is an abortion.  The dpad was alienated, the C buttons seem like a joke, and the joystick brings me about as much joy as putting my dick in a bugzapper.  Its flimsy, slippery, stiff to move around, and if you're using a controller that some jackoff used to play mario party, its probably near-dead and responds funny.

There were BATTERY POWERED addons.   WHY.

I liked:

Mischief Makers
Jet Force Gemini
some other crap I cant even remember.

SCREW THE N64

[guyjin]

I can't believe I'm about to defend the N64:

Extremely poor 3D graphics when viewed in retrospect (not that they were a real treat at time of release). To make matters worse, the console features, like, less than 10 2D games (OK, maybe 20). That means 95% of the console's library looks like shit visually.

Its 3D graphics were better than its competitors. this is more of an indictment against polygonal gaming than of the N64.

Also, I don't think the n64's controller was the worst of all time; I think the 5200's was worse.

[SignOfZeta]

I voted N64, as all rational people would given these choices.

but we all know that the correct answer is the Virtual Boy.

Yes, this is true. Since its nearly impossible to take that piece if shit anywhere, or to even hold it entirely in your hands while playing it, the VB essentially is a console, and the worst thing Nintendo ever made. In fact, its worse than anything Sony ever made. Its that bad.

[rag-time4]

Before reading the thread I voted gamecube, strictly because of the controller. Looking back, the N64 had a real winner of a controller as well.

I really agree with what Dan said about Mario 64... Mario Kart was really neat as well in 3d, and I remember enjoying the star wars adventure game as well.