My next eBay description, let me know what you think;
Up for grabs is a near mint copy of <insert game>!  Well, it would be near mint except for the fact I live in a smoke filled environment with 5 filthy dogs.  I also stored it in my bathroom in direct sunlight beside a large electro-magnet.  Last year the entire game fell into a pot of gravy we were making for Thanksgiving dinner.  But other than that it's NEAR MINT!  Oh, and did I mention this is the only copy that has been posted on eBay this week!  Uber R@RE!